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Abstract Background Millions of people use language models to discuss mental health concerns, including suicidal ideation, but limited frameworks exist for evaluating whether these systems respond safely. Benchmarking, the practice of administering standardized assessments to language models, offers direct parallels to clinical competency evaluation, yet few clinicians are involved in designing, validating, or interpreting these assessments. Aims To introduce mental health professionals to benchmarking language models by administering a validated clinical instrument and demonstrating how configuration decisions, measurement limitations, and scoring context affect result interpretation. Method We administered the Suicide Intervention Response Inventory (SIRI-2) programmatically to nine commercially available language models from three providers. Each item was presented 60 times per model (three prompt variants × two temperature settings x 10 repetitions), yielding 27,000 model responses compared against point-in-time expert consensus. Results Total scores ranged from 19.5 to 84.0 (expert panel baseline: 32.5). Prompt design alone shifted individual model scores by as much as the difference between trained and untrained human groups. The best performing model approached the instrument’s measurement floor. All nine models consistently overrated clinically inappropriate responses that sounded supportive. Conclusions A single benchmark score can support markedly different claims depending on the assumed standard of clinical behavior, the instrument’s remaining measurement range, and the configuration that produced the result. The skills required to make these distinctions must become core competencies. Benchmark results are increasingly utilized to support claims about mental health safety that may not be accurate, making it necessary to close the gap between clinical measurement and AI. Plain Language Summary AI chatbots like ChatGPT, Claude, and Gemini are increasingly used by millions of people to discuss mental health problems, including thoughts of suicide. To assess whether these systems handle such conversations safely, researchers give them standardized tests called benchmarks and compare their answers to those of human experts. These scores are already used to argue AI systems are ready for clinical use. This study gave a well-established test of suicide response skills to nine AI models from three major companies under varying conditions. We changed how much instruction the AI received and how much randomness was built into its responses, then measured whether the scores changed. The same AI model could score like a trained crisis counselor under one set of conditions and like an untrained undergraduate under another, depending on choices the person running the test made. Every model also made the same kind of mistake: responses that sounded warm and caring were rated as appropriate, even when experts had judged them to be clinically problematic. The highest-scoring model performed so well that the test could no longer measure whether it was truly skilled or had simply exceeded the test’s range. These findings show that a single score can be misleading without knowing how the test was run, whether it can still distinguish strong from weak performance, and whether it matches what the AI is used for. Mental health professionals routinely make these judgments about clinical assessments and are well positioned to bring that expertise to AI evaluation.